Just for Today

Oh, God, give me grace for this day.  Not for a lifetime, nor for next week, nor for tomorrow, just for this day.  Direct my thoughts and bless them.  Direct my work and bless it.  Direct the things I say, and give them blessing too.  Direct and bless everything that I think and speak and do.  So that for this one day, just this one day, I have the gift of grace that comes from your presence.  Oh, God, for this day, just for this one day, let me live generously, kindly, in a state of grace and goodness that denies my many imperfections and makes me more like you.

I found this prayer in a book by Marjorie Homes written in the 60's and thought it was such an honest plea to live out the day as a godly woman.  I have read it so many times that it is almost memorized.  How hard is it to stay focused on the One we are supposed to be in constant communion with?  How hard is it to remain "set apart" in this world?  How easily I find myself like the "frog in the boiling pot" where the temperature has been turned up ever so slightly until it's boiling...  Look at where we're all spending our time and energy - it's not with each other (unless facebook counts....but that's apparently become too confusing and complicated to use).  We spend our time in constant motion - running from this rather meaningless obligation to that - spinning plates like a circus clown when what (who!) begs for our attention and focus is right in front of us.  I fear that I am missing out on my kids sometimes because I am so busy "doing" for them.  I saw how much I've been doing instead of being tonight when we played a great game of family hide-and-seek.  They absolutely lit up when I said yes and that I'd be "it" first (instead of the "in just a minute, I have to finish ______________ first....").  What fun we had!

God has been working on me for sometime to resist the ways of the world and to remain set apart.  I thought this was so that I would be able to set a godly example for my kids; I'm sure that is part of His intent.  But after this week, I wonder if I'm not being taught to resist "doing" like everyone else so that I can "be" with my kids - hopefully setting a godly example for them to follow, but also showing them how to care about and value someone with face time.  I believe I'm being told to slow down, focus, play, listen.

I'm struck by my childhood memories of my two grandmothers:  both wonderful, godly women and I was blessed to have them be such a big part of my childhood.  One was a "do-er" and one was a "be-er".  Of the "do-er", I haven't a single childhood memory of her just playing - she was feeding, cleaning, bathing us, but never playing.  Of the "be-er", I remember fishing, walking, playing with worms, picking figs and muskadine grapes, playing cards - just a number of wonderful things.  I love both women the same and am so grateful for both.  I realize, however, that when my kids look back, I want them to remember me as a "be-er" mom.  I've got a lot of work ahead of me...

Just for today, Lord, just for today.